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Tuesday, January 12, 2010
I only post this blog when im damn fucking angry or damn sad.
Sorry for the vulgars.
Not that I wanted.
Baby said I have to be more kind and respect elder people more.
He doesnt even know WHAT IM THINKING LA.
The mdm chiam thing, I ALREADY KNOW from beginning of the year she already very kelian and she very kind. I pity her in my heart but not on the outside.
I know respect elder people I understand well of respect better than anyone else! WTF?
MY OLD FREAKING LIFE I NV DISRESPECT ANY PEOPLE BEFORE.

NO body is perfect. I am not angry. Im just hurt. He understand how i feels. zZz.
The edwin thing, care for him is suppose to be normal. How the hell i know he will feel irritated for this small matters? It's just normal reaction not between girl or boy. Zzz .

I love baby alot. Seriously. I love him. DAMN ALOT.
It's just hurt, and I cannot take it anymore. I know myself more than anyone. I no need u to tell me. Unless I dunno. If i made mistake, i'll know. Unless its unknownly. No need people to tell me. I know whats good or bad.


& Love ain't is about sacrifice

Friday, July 31, 2009
I'm being paranoid again. Or not..


& Love ain't is about sacrifice

Friday, July 17, 2009
DO not care too much. IF NOT you will only end up hurting yourself.
I've learned this.

DO NOT trust too much too, If not falling into the trap is yourself..
This is reality isn't it.

Get a grab of yourself la.
Zzzzzzzzz..............


& Love ain't is about sacrifice

Sunday, July 12, 2009
I guess I din't delete this blog after all. The last previous time i log in this, was April.
Now it's July.. Time passes really fast eh...
I Love Ryan. I seriously do. And ALOT more than anyone could imagine.
And of cuz, whenever i blogged here is when i feel depress or sad or whatever.

I might be going crazy soon.
I dunno why i couldnt handle my life now.
When ever Ryan replies me with cold sms, like only a word or something w/o smiles.
My minds always wonder to the past when he broke up with me twice.
I'm still hurt. Though it's just a scar.
Scars do hurt sometimes - physically or non-physically.
I cried hard, when he is not around.
I want people to know! But I dun want them to know I'm such a crybaby.
I hate it when I cry easily....
But i don't know what to do! It's like your trying to walk without legs or hands...

I tried to distract myself from thinking, but it just won't go away..
Those words.. He said so easily to me... To him I'm just a ..... woman...
I........... dunno what will happen to me again if he leaves me.
I dun even dare to think of that.. even though i know he will ...... somedays...............
All I could do is cry. What else.
Though i have so many friends around. and good friends..
I feel so... far to reach out for them.. I wanted to call.. but my hands will not press the buttons..
I want attention from everyone, but..... I HATE IT.
Well.. Nobody will understand this kind of feelings i have. I'm adnormal i guess, always think too much.. i also cant help it..

Please don't leave me.
I love you.


& Love ain't is about sacrifice

Saturday, April 18, 2009
Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.
Now both of them are coming back. At the same time?
What is this? Dump liao den find back?
I used to love both of them. and..... I was really.... Deeply heart broken..
More ever.. Ryan hurt me twice..

Im lost. Please show me my choice in future leh.. zzzZ..
I dunno what to do... How?!
I have totally no feel to Ezra, just good fren........
Both of them confessing.. and hinting........ and asking.....
I just feel like scolding them.
For those excuses....
That time i dunno why i like that la.... and bla bla bla..

Sigh...


& Love ain't is about sacrifice

Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Cold Cold Cold.
Why are u doing this?
Talking me like for a fake people..
ARGGGG. I cannot stand the love of pain already la.
I just wanna dig out my heart out and throw away already...
zZzZ. ):

I just wanna die... The feelings now fucking sucked.


& Love ain't is about sacrifice

Wednesday, March 25, 2009
I asked you if you like her?
You said no right.. I'm glad so..
But.. wonder whats keeping you from being with me..
Please. anything. doesn't matters anymore.. if im beening hurt again the 3rd time.
I dun care anything else already.
I just want you. Only you.


& Love ain't is about sacrifice